Standing On His Promises

Standing, Standing, Standing on the promises of Christ My Savior! Love that song and chorus.

The above sentence is a song that I started singing a few months ago, out of the clear blue sky, when I picked Joshua 1:9 NIV as my life verse. "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

You see, I had a car accident 11 years ago that left me with some lasting injuries. One of those being severe dizziness. It took me three years of going from Doctor to Doctor from Specialist to Specialist to finally have someone run extensive test and put a name to what was wrong, Vestibular Nerve Damage and Meniere's Disease. During this time I developed alot of anxiety and depression. I have always had some form of anxiety (worry, doubt, not good enough) and depression hidden down deep but now it would surface more often. My life changed during this time along with surgery to put a plate in my neck from a bulging disc.

Fast foward to today, I have been home for over a year due to the dizziness. During this time anxiety and fear consumed me. Doctors not listening to me and I just didn't have the energy or fight left in me to push forward. I was too tired, stressed at home, stressed at work, not sleeping, not eating right, I was just too tired. Now that I look back I believe God had His hand in it. I was struggling trying to balance my job (taking on too many responsibilities and not asking for help), kids (jealousy, arguements, school, chores) my husband and my home.

During this time I was asking God to help me but I was so busy that I couldn't hear Him. I did not take time to spend quality personal time with Him. Don't get me wrong, I would pray on the way to work (two to three minute drive), I would sit in my car sometimes at lunch and listen to the christian music station, I went to church on most Sundays... but... that is not want God wanted. He wanted a personal relationship with me. How could I possibly listen to Him I was too busy.

I started trying to find God and what He wanted me to do. I was reading book after book, devotion after devotion, watching christian television programming one after another and seeking advice from two very dear christian family members. God started working in me, healing me from past wounds one at a time. This wasn't easy, I fought tooth and nail. I am a control freak and to let go and let God wasn't in my vocabulary. I wanted instant results not to wait in faith. Faith? Wait? Oh no .... we have a problem.

I had always tried to be there in times of need for my extended family. If someone was in the hospital I would sit with them or visit them everyday if not stay around the clock. Now, I needed them... I needed them to hold me, pick me up, get me to a hospital or Doctor and admit me until they found out what was going on. I just didn't have the strength to fight anymore.

In all my reading and watching television there was one verse that constantly stood out, Jermiah 29:11 NIV, "For I know the plans I have for you, "declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." Thank you God for this verse you don't want to harm me you want me to grow. The enemy wants to harm me the enemy wants me to remain where I am.

 A year ago my brother called to tell me about a woman he heard speak and he wanted to read me a page in her book which turned into him reading a chapter from her book. The person was Lysa Terkeurst and I could relate to the chapter he was reading from her book, skating and 80's music. I had to have her book and I started following her online. That was 11 months ago and it is amazing to see what God has done during this time.

I can remember in August I came across a verse in Renee Swope's book, A Confident Heart, that I picked as my life verse. I had a Doctor's appointment coming up and fear was rearing it's ugly head with the what ifs. I imagined God talking to me in a stern fatherly voice saying, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9 NIV. I was rocking my grandaughter and looking out her window at the trees and the sky and just started reciting that verse over and over. I then started singing out of the clear blue, Standing standing standing on the promises of Christ my Savior standing standing I'm standing on the promises of God.

I felt peace not just any peace but an unexplainable peace and joy. I had goose bumps and tears rolling down my face. A few months later I posted on my Facebook page the verse from Joshua 1:9 and that I was standing on the promises. A lady who is like family and had been my grandfather's right hand at work for many years before he passed away told me that he was leading that song in church the night he passed away. I got goose bumps all over again.

No matter what we face each day if we "Stand on HIS Promises" He will be there, He will show up and direct us. After all He did command us to be strong and courageous not fearful or discouraged and He will be with us wherever we go. What an awesome promise to stand on!