Thursday, November 14, 2013

A Place of Surrender

"All to Jesus I surrender
All to Him I freely give
I will ever love and trust Him
In His presence daily live
I surrender All."

I grew up going to church and knew right from wrong. I was baptized in Junior High and was part of the Youth Group and Youth Choir. I felt at home in church. I didn't want to leave everytime we went.

The biggest Christian influence in my life was my mom.



  When my mom died on July 4th, 1989 and flew home on the wings of Eagles to Heaven....

"but those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint."
Isaiah 40:31
(One of her favorite verses.)


I was lost ...I RAN...... Just like the Roadrunner... I RAN....


photo from amazon

but not to God .... I RAN from church.... I RAN from God.

After years and years of running from God and living life in the wrong ways. I found myself in bed due to health reasons AND I could no longer run from God and could no longer block out running from the Truth. He was chasing me all along but I kept running. Running from my past.... a past I had burried.

After many, many tearful phone calls with my brother.....


 
urging me to surrender everything to God. Telling me to reach out to God, and surrender, to the only person that could heal all my wounds and allow me to live a life free in God.

I started to surrender....I started crying out to God to forgive me, to help me and I started my journey of  Surrendering All to Him. I thought I had given everything to Him until a few years ago I read A Confident Heart and it opened up some old wounds that I had no clue were still burried. I understood at that point what my brother had been urging me to do. To ask God to reveal to me if there was anything I was still holding on to so that I could move past it and the bondage that I was in.... SURRENDER ALL.... the hurt, anger, unforgiveness, betrayal.... the list goes on and .....


I finally Surrendered ALL to God .....

.....and what a journey it has been! God is sooo good and the blessings that He gives me I feel so undeserving. Even as I struggle daily with the curve balls that the life throws my way I Surrender ALL and know God is working it all for His purpose.

This is my temporary home...

I Surrender ALL and look forward to that time in Heaven with my mom!